S1.6: Giles

“Well, as we all know, there’s no single sitting for supper, unlike breakfast. We all use the kitchen as space is available. I think we three ate together that night. I cooked. Was it my ‘bean surprise’? 

“Yes, followed by your ‘prune eye-opener’, I seem to recall! A challenging time was had by all!” 

Masongill, good naturedly, ignores this. “And afterwards, in the cosy area off the dining hall by the stove, near the front door, everyone seemed in a strange quiet mood. I think even Alcock finds the Pod a bit weird. Talking to the Pod is like talking to a minor Greek deity. You can’t guess her mood. Greek gods might give or take, be kind or mean, or even do some smiting! That’s the Pod. It’s also a bit like Florence the cat too! Why are they both on the Board of Governors?!? 

“And then there was a noise from just outside and Hannah went outside, as she does during the evenings, and retrieved a box. It seemed to hum. 

“Alcock opened it and there was a pea inside, but none of the peas we know. It had coal-black, crow-black, Bible-black, eyes, whereas proper peas have green eyes. It might have been a bit smaller. And it made noises. Peas are silent! We all know that. Pea 101! It chirruped, sort of purred and gurgled and seemed to vibrate like a clockwork toy. 

“And then we heard the Pod, which must have been coming from or transmitted by the pea, obviously, but that somehow seemed odder than normal. How could this gurgling pea carry the Pod’s thoughts? She said:

“‘I have made this pea, Giles, to help you. He is not your pea. He is mine. But I have made him to be able to tolerate absence from his Pod as his siblings cannot. For that reason, he is not like them. You will need to look after him because he is not so closely connected to me. Despite that, if you speak to him with vigour, even just with your meagre thoughts, you will speak to me. Feed him with nectar every other day and return him to me at least once a week.’ 

“I must say that my first thought was: where do we buy nectar?...

“While we had been ‘listening’ to this, amazingly no one had kept an eye on the pea itself. Talking to the Pod seems to make everyone behave like idiots just when we want to look especially competent! And when we looked up, there was Giles, in the kitchen, slurping up a small dish of marmalade someone had left from breakfast, gurgling and chirruping. 

“I remember Lottie saying at the time ‘He’s quite lovely. He can sleep on my bunk! If he ever goes to sleep.’ But in fact, having feasted on marmalade, Giles was already snoring. So Alcock placed him carefully back in his box and shut the lid for safe-keeping.”