5.14: The summons

It is the 31st of July and the feast day of St Joseph of Arimathea. At least, according to the Greek Orthodox view of things. After a day of tense anticipation it is now 8pm: the time that pTravis, Masongill and Lottie have decided is the right time to try the ritual. 

(Lottie was all for doing it straight away after breakfast but the others thought that it ought to be carried out at the time one might hold a feast which, they thought, should always be in the evening.)

Running an extension cord from the Potting Shed, they have set up an ironing board and found the iron taken off Juggins a year earlier which they have set to ‘linen’ and left on for several minutes. It is very hot.

One of the scarves with a sponge insignia is draped across it. To maximise success, they have selected what they assume is the most important scarf: the red one. They hypothesise that the point of the ritual is that it is a kind of blasphemy. Surely the Order of the Sponge, formed because of St Joseph of Arimathea’s gnostic knowledge of fabric care, would not countenance the singeing of precious cloth? Surely they will somehow step in to stop this?

“Are we ready?” asks pTravis.

“What words are we going to say?” replies Lottie. 

“We don’t know what we should say so we will just have to hope that the act itself is enough.”

“We’ll look stupid standing silently around while we try to burn a scarf with an iron!”

“If pTravis will do the honours with the iron, I’ll say something” Masongill suggests. And so pTravis places the red hot iron on the scarf…

… and Masongill slowly chants the following questions and answers.

“‘Whose was it?’ ‘His who is gone.’
‘Who shall have it?’ ‘He who will come.’
‘What was the month?’ ‘The sixth from the first.’
‘Where was the sun?’ ‘Over the oak.’
‘Where was the shadow?’ ‘Under the elm.’
‘How was it stepped?’ ‘North by ten and by ten, east by five and by five, south by two and by two, west by one and by one, and so under.’
‘What shall we give for it?’ ‘All that is ours.’
‘Why should we give it?’ ‘For the sake of the trust.’”

The others are a little surprised. “Did you just make that up?” asks Lottie. “It was obviously stupid but at least it sounded the right sort of stupid.” 

Then she looks down at the scarf, lifts the iron a little and says. “Hang on! Although the iron’s very hot itself, it is not giving out any heat to the scarf!”

They look at one another in bafflement.